


Side Fic with Benefits

by awolangel



Category: Naruto
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Cunnilingus, Daddy Kink, Double Penetration, Double Penetration in Two Holes, F/M, Female Reader, Light Bondage, Oral Sex, Overstimulation, POV Second Person, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Reader-Insert, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Smut, Spanking, THANK YOU JUICY, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, gorgeous fanart
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-11-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:53:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 16,910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25384858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awolangel/pseuds/awolangel
Summary: A companion piece to my main Maid with Benefits fic. Will be full of one-shots, drabbles, and alternate scenes so updates will be sporadic. Will add more tags as I go.Enjoy!
Relationships: Hoshigaki Kisame/Reader, Kakuzu (Naruto)/Reader
Comments: 152
Kudos: 511





	1. Chapter 11 Alternate Kakuzu Hate-fuck (Non-canon)

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 11 Alternate Kakuzu hate-fuck scene. Non-canon. Enjoy, my lovelies!

Your “practice” pays off a couple of days later when Kakuzu once again comes knocking at your door, once again waiting until bedtime to come to you. Neither of you says anything as you just step to the side to let him in, watching with a suppressed roll of your eyes as he once again plops his ass down in your desk chair and pulls out his fully-hard cock.

“Hopefully you’ve gotten better at this, girlie,” he growls as you close the door and make your way over. “I’d hate to be disappointed twice.”

You mentally roll your eyes as you drop to your knees and get to work. You’ll just let your actions speak for themselves. With any luck you’ll leave the asshole completely speechless because you’re damn tired of his shitty, degrading remarks and horrid attitude.

He’s a definitely more of a mouthful than Deidara, though. Not quite as much of one as Kisame but more than enough to leave your jaw sore if you don’t take care of this fairly quickly. You slick the length of him with your tongue, taking a wicked, almost vindictive delight in the resulting hitch of his breath. His hand reaches out to tangle its fingers in your hair, so big it sprawls over the entirety of the top of your head. If he weren’t such a scary fucking shithead you would _love_ to have it between your thighs.

But that’s not what he’s here for so you focus your attention on the task at hand – bringing this asshole to his knees with your pretty little mouth.

He sucks in a sharp breath as you take the beautifully flushed head of his cock in your mouth, fingers tightening their grip in your hair when you let out an involuntary hum at the sound. You _hate_ that you’re still attracted to this man despite everything. It’s just not _fair_. Not right. He tried to fucking kill you over something you didn’t even do and had absolutely no control over! And now you’re contractually obligated to sleep with his grumpy, murderous bastard ass. You won’t even get any relief from it yourself because he insists on being selfish and only using you for oral. Fucking asshole.

As you slowly start working your mouth down the length of his cock, though, he gets impatient.

A grunt is the only warning you get before he’s roughly pushing your head down, hitting the back of your throat and making you gag as your eyes start to water. He forces you into a few bobs before you start smacking at his thighs, desperate to come up before you puke. You gasp when he finally lets you, thick fingers still tangled in your locks as he pulls you off him with a smirk as you cough and sputter.

“You were moving a bit too slow so I figured I’d help you out a little,” he mock-purrs. God, you hate him _so much_.

“ _You_ may be into vomit, asshole, but _I’m_ sure as hell not!” you snarl as you glare daggers at him and rub at your throat. “You already almost choked me to death _once_ , shithead! I _really_ don’t want a repeat performance. If you want to be rough you can fuck my cunt. Otherwise you can just go fuck yourself because _I_ sure as hell won’t do it!”

His eyes narrow to dangerous little slits, hand tightening in your hair as he uses it to drag you up to look into his face. You wince as you’re forced to stretch up to meet him, terrifying red-green eyes filling your vision.

“You seem to forget just what it is you were hired for, girlie,” he growls lowly, hot breath fanning across your face. You curse the involuntary shiver it forces down your spine, at the slick it forces from your pussy. “You’re here to serve. To be used. Not to be a mouthy little bitch.”

“And _you_ seem to forget that I’ve gained a few friends here,” you hiss as your eyes start to water again from the sharp sting against your scalp. “Either you stop trying to choke me to death with your dick or start fucking my cunt instead or I’ll call Kisame and Itachi in here and let you deal with _them_.”

You didn’t think his eyes could narrow any further but they somehow do; turning to scary, razor-thin slits. You just smirk back, knowing you’ve got him now.

The next thing you know you’re being yanked up by your hair as he stands, stumbling after him as he all but drags you over to the bed. It’s good to know that your little threat holds some real weight.

You yelp as you’re tossed onto it, Kakuzu’s large hands tugging harshly at your clothes. Soon you’re completely naked, glaring up at him as he finishes removing his own pants before climbing on after you. Before you can open your mouth to say something snarky, though, you’re flipped over onto your front with your face shoved into the mattress. You hate yourself for how much it turns you on.

“Seems I need to show you just who you’re dealing with here, girlie,” he growls hotly in your ear, his weight bearing down on your back. “After all, you can’t backtalk me if you’re too busy screaming.”

“Deidara talked a big game, too, asshole, and he didn’t know jack _shit_ ,” you taunt, voice muffled by your sheets. Just what the hell has gotten into you? You should be _terrified_ right now. Either dead quiet or begging for mercy. Not fucking goading him on!

“Obviously he’s not the only one who doesn’t know jack shit,” he hisses as the hand not yanking at your scalp slips under your body to press between your thighs. You tense as you feel his thick fingers brush roughly over your slit, already regrettably damp. You hate that your body is reacting this way, that the prospect of what he’s about to do makes you almost drunkenly giddy. “Do you really think I didn’t notice how wet you got just from sucking me off for two minutes? You can deny it all you want but deep down you’re just a common whore, an eager little slut that can’t _wait_ to take my cock.”

“And you’re still a huge fucking asshole that’s been all talk so far,” you taunt as you twist your face to smirk back at him over your shoulder. Whatever demon is possessing you right now sure isn’t ready to let go of your body quite yet.

A low, animalistic growl is all the warning you get before he pulls back to shove your legs open and slam himself into your slick, aching cunt. You yelp as he immediately sets a brutal pace, hips slamming against your ass so hard it makes the bed rock. All you can do is hold on for the ride, fingers curling tightly in the sheets as he takes out his frustrations on your eager body. God, this really shouldn’t turn you on as much as it does.

Just as you slip a hand down your front to play with your clit they’re both snatched up by thick, black tendrils. You grunt as they’re dragged to rest in front of you, a single cord looping around your wrists to bind them together tight enough to chafe. God, why is he such an asshole and why do you still want to fuck him so much?!

“If you think you still have any control here you’re wrong, girlie,” he leans over to hiss against the shell of your ear as he continues to thrust. You shiver violently, at his words and his deep, sexy tone and the hot breath against your sensitive skin. “You asked for this and now you’re getting it.”

“I didn’t ask for shit, asshole,” you hiss right back, pissed that he’s not letting you relieve yourself. “You just assumed you had the right to this because you’re a selfish fucking prick.”

A sudden, harsh slap to your ass has you yelping, skin stinging after the hit.

“You didn’t ask for it outright but your body sure did,” he grunts as he slips a hand under your body and between your thighs to gather up some of the slick there. He roughly shoves his fingers into your mouth afterwards, making you taste yourself on his skin. You bite at them. He just chuckles darkly as he hooks them against the inside of your cheek and tugs. “Besides, you told me to either stop fucking your mouth or to fuck your cunt instead so that’s _exactly_ what I’m doing.”

“At least let me touch myself, you selfish bastard!” you spit as best you can as you tug uselessly against the cord still wrapped around your wrists.

“Ask me nicely and I may just touch you myself.”

_Ugh. Such an asshole._

“Fine,” you concede, more desperate for the friction than you are to keep your pride. He smirks as he pulls his fingers from your mouth to better hear you. “ _Please_ touch me, you evil, grumpy fuck.”

Another harsh slap to your ass. “That was hardly _nice_ , girlie,” he growls.

You _whine_ ; the slick, hot friction dragging against your walls driving you mad without being quite _enough_. “Goddamnit – _PLEASE touch me, Kakuzu!_ ” you all but sob. “I need your fingers! I ache so badly! Please, please, _please_!”

“See, now was that so hard?” he mocks as he finally, _finally_ gives you what you want. You moan loud and long as he once again squeezes a hand under your front and reaches between your spread thighs to rub those strong, calloused fingers against your swollen, aching clit. God, combined with his thick cock and short, harsh thrusts stretching you out you can’t help but come on the spot.

You _wail_ as it barrels through you; body tensing and shaking as you ride it out. He just hisses as he fucks you through it, fingers never stopping the relentless toying of your clit. It quickly becomes too much.

“Too much!” you gasp as oversensitivity starts to take over. You try to crawl away on instinct, try to escape the white-hot jolts of pleasure-pain between your legs. “Too much, too much!”

“Oh no you don’t,” Kakuzu grunts as more threads snake out of his body to wrap around your waist and drag you back against him, firmly holding you in place as he continues to pound into you from behind. His fingers still keep rubbing and swirling around the place above the carnal joining of your sweat-slick bodies, obviously getting off on your twitches and gasps. “This is _exactly_ what you wanted and I’m in a generous enough mood to give it to you.”

“Kakuzuuuu!” you keen as you shake and shiver and come again, orgasm crashing through hot on the heels of the first one. He just chuckles darkly as he smacks your ass, watching you with dark, hungry eyes as you once again come undone under him.

“See?” he pants as he leans down against your back for a better look at your flushed, sweat-damp, fucked-silly face. “Your slutty little body knows what it wants better than _you_ do, girlie.”

You’re _way_ too far gone to think of a witty response. All you can do is pant and moan and grip the bed sheets as he keeps fucking you like his life depends on it, hips smacking against your ass so hard you wouldn’t be surprised if he leaves bruises. His fingers keep up their relentless toying of your clit, his thick cock forcing you to take him over and over and over again and making you drool and twitch and gasp as the delicious friction and pleasure-pain overwhelm everything else.

He pushes you through two more orgasms before he finally, blessedly comes himself. His hips stutter as it overtakes him, thrusts turning short and sharp before stopping completely as he buries himself in you to the hilt; grunting as a wet heat overtakes your insides and spills down your thighs. He leans heavy on your back as he comes back down; both of you flushed and panting and covered in thick sheens of sweat as you wonder what the fuck just happened.

“So, uh,” you start as horny-brain finally starts to give way to regular-brain. “Are you going to ever get off me, or…?” You _do_ still hate him, after all. Good hate-fuck or not he’s still a murderous asshole.

“I don’t know,” he huffs against the back of your neck, tone surprisingly playful. “Are you going to stop being a mouthy little shit?”

“Honestly? If it keeps making you fuck me like _that_ then the answer is ‘hell no’,” you answer.

He just chuckles as he sits up and pulls out, thick cords leaving your waist and wrists as they snake back into his body. You sit up and rub at your wrists, trying to get rid of the slight tingling sensation.

“Well, it’s good to know that you’re good for _something_ around here, girlie,” he says gruffly as he slides off the bed and helps himself to digging around in your nightstand. He pulls back a moment later with the baby wipes, pulling one out for himself before tossing the rest of the pack at your head. You squawk as it makes contact, bouncing off your forehead before falling into your lap.

“Yeah, because keeping the house clean and feeding your grumpy ass don’t mean jack shit I guess,” you growl as you yank a wipe out and start cleaning yourself. God, he’s _such an asshole_.

“That’s just part of your job,” he reminds you as he tosses his wipe in the trash. You glare at him as he moves to get re-dressed, pouty despite yourself. “You’re getting paid for those things.”

“Technically I’m getting paid to fuck you too, remember?” you huff as you throw your own wipe away.

“Yeah, but you aren’t getting paid to enjoy it,” he shoots back easily. Your jaw actually drops a little at the shitty smirk he sends you before his lips once again disappear behind his mask.

“Yeah, well, you enjoyed it too, asshole!” you parry weakly, crossing your arms.

“But that’s the whole point, girlie,” he replies as he moves to leave. “You best remember that.”

And with that he’s out the door, closing it behind him as he leaves you to stew in your mixed, confusing emotions. 

_Fucking asshole._


	2. GORGEOUS FANART BY @JuicyBones568

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> @JuicyBones568 on Twitter made some GORGEOUS fanart inspired by my story and I just HAVE to share it with you all!! I mean just LOOK at it! Gah, my heart can't take this. I love you all so much I could cry. Juicy, this honestly means the world to me and you've made my whole damn year!

<https://twitter.com/JuicyBones568/status/1285082837088186369>

<https://twitter.com/JuicyBones568/status/1285052202126585856>


	3. Chapter 11 Kisame Scene (Canon)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, my lovelies! Enjoy!

You drag him down for a desperate kiss as soon as your door is locked, hands fisted in the collar of his cloak as you lick and nip at his lips. He chuckles as he easily concedes; bending down to make it easier for you as his hands move to rest against your hips.

You start tugging buttons open immediately, ready to get the real show on the road. He shrugs it off once it’s hanging open, mouth never leaving yours as his hands immediately move to tug your shorts down to pool at your ankles. You both finally pull away just long enough to remove the rest of your clothes, stumbling over to the bed once you’re both completely bare.

“How do you want to do this, kitten?” he husks before you can latch onto his lips again.

“How do _you_ want to do this, big guy?” you purr back as you stretch up to start licking and nipping at his throat instead. You press your hands flat against his chest as you do, eagerly running them down over his dusky nipples. You smirk against his skin when you feel him shudder against you. God, he’s so sexy.

“Well, I wouldn’t feel right just letting you do all the work so what do you say to a 69?” he suggests lowly, blue-gray skin already taking on that purple-red flush you love so much.

You hum as you think about it. “What’s wrong with letting me take care of you? Besides, I don’t know if I could concentrate properly with that lovely mouth of yours between my legs at the same time, Kisame.”

He chuckles as he moves to lightly pinch at your nipples, eyes darkening when you gasp and arch into his touch. “There’s nothing wrong with it, kitten,” he murmurs, eyes lidded. “I just like watching and hearing you get all worked up. Besides, I’d _love_ to make that pretty mouth of yours moan around my cock while you work.”

You groan at his words, core clenching as heat and slick pool there. He’s just too good.

“…Alright,” you concede with a smirk. “I guess we can give it a shot.”

He smirks back as he moves to stretch out on your bed, motioning you over when he’s ready. You turn to face his ankles as you swing your leg over to straddle his face, situating yourself so that you have easy access to his big, beautiful cock. It’s a bit of a stretch, considering the size difference, but you make it work. It’s already fully hard, twitching in your hand as you reach out to gently grab it. You smirk as you hear his breath hitch, giving it a few good pumps before you bend over to run your tongue teasingly over the head. He moans as his large, strong hands move to grip the backs of your thighs, a brush of cool air hitting your damp slit as he uses his thumbs to part your pussy lips. You suck in a breath at the feeling, cunt clenching deliciously.

“ _God_ , kitten,” he breathes almost reverently, warm breath making you shiver. “You’re already so wet down here and I’ve barely touched you.”

“I guess that’s just the effect you have on me, handsome,” you purr before you lick a long, wet stripe up his cock from root to tip. You gently blow on it just to see what will happen, giggling when it twitches. “You’re just too good at this.”

“I’m not the only one who’s good at this, kitten,” he groans with a gentle kiss to your already swollen clit. He chuckles darkly when you shiver. “You’re enough to drive most any man crazy, you know that?”

“And I thought you were gonna put that sexy mouth of yours to work, Kisa,” you tease with a sultry glance over your shoulder. He just chuckles again.

“And here I thought you _liked_ my banter,” he teases right back. “Guess I’ll just have to-“

His breath hitches as you suddenly lean over and take the entirety of his cockhead into your hot, eager mouth. You hum at the low moan that follows, infinitely pleased at the sound. Sex is _so_ much better when they let themselves be vocal. It turns you on so much.

“Alright, kitten,” he starts with a gentle smack to your thigh, “if _that’s_ how you wanna play…”

You gasp around his cock at the slick, sudden sensation of his tongue running up the length of your slit, stopping at the top to probe teasingly at your hole. You shudder violently when you feel it breach you; moaning and clutching at his thighs. God, everything about this man is thick, tongue included. Just the knowledge that he’s currently fucking you with it is enough to drive you wild and make you clench around it.

Not to be outdone, you do your damnedest to focus on the cock in front of you despite the lovely happenings between your legs. Kisame is _far_ too big to take all the way but you manage to work your way about halfway down; sucking and swirling your tongue as you go. You hum again at the dark growl in earns you, Kisame’s thighs twitching as he obviously restrains a strong buck of his hips at the sensations. You’d smirk if your lips weren’t currently stretched wide around his cock.

You feel his strong tongue swirl around inside you a few times before pulling back out. You grunt in obvious displeasure, wiggling your hips in an attempt to entice him into putting it back. He just chuckles.

“Don’t worry kitten. I’m not going to leave you empty or wanting,” he purrs with another gentle smack to your thigh. “I’ve still got to get you all nice and ready for my cock. I want to feel you come on it again.”

You moan and clench at his words, wiggling your hips again. You bring one of your hands to stroke at the half of him you can’t fit in your mouth just as you feel one of his thick, strong fingers slip easily inside you.

Just like before he works you up gradually, slipping in one finger at a time as his mouth works your aching clit. It’s…deliciously distracting. All you want to do is pull off him and ride his handsome face, buck and grind until you’re coming all over it. But that wouldn’t be fair and you still need to practice so you do your best to enjoy it while still paying him the attention it deserves.

You bring your other hand to play with his heavy balls as you start to bob your head, sucking and swirling your tongue as you go. Your jaw is already starting to ache a little but you don’t dare stop. You want to make this good for him, too. Clearly it’s working if the delicious hums and moans against your slick, sensitive clit are anything to go by. God, you’re not going to last long like this.

When he starts curling his fingers against your g-spot you clench, sucking in a sharp breath through your nose. You shiver and whine around his cock as he pokes and prods and gently laps at your clit, finally coming undone when he wraps his lips around it and gives it a good, hard suck.

You gag as your orgasm barrels through you, quickly pulling off him as your entire body tenses and shakes above him. He just holds your thigh steady with his free hand, groaning mouth never letting up as he works you through it. He blessedly pulls away as you come back down, over-sensitivity making you twitch.

“You want another one, sweetheart, or are you ready to take me?” he asks as he smooths his beautiful hands up and down the outsides of your thighs. 

“You don’t want me to make you come with my mouth?” you pant as you look back over your shoulder at him. The sight of his shiny, flushed face and hazy eyes makes your cunt clench all over again.

“Maybe some other time,” he replies with a smirk. “Right now all I want is your pretty pussy. You’re so _wet_ down here, kitten. I can’t wait to add to it.”

You _moan_. God, how is he so good at this? He turns you on so _effortlessly_.

“In that case, how do you want me, big guy?” you purr as you sit up and shift around to face him, cunt clenching when you feel his cock twitch against your ass. Yeah, you’re _definitely_ ready to have it in you.

“Do you know the ‘pretzel’ position?” he asks, glancing up into your own hazy eyes.

You shake your head as you hum. “No. Show me?”

He chuckles, light and good-natured. “Alright. Lie down on your side, kitten.” 

You gently roll off him to comply, shifting to rest your head against your pillow as you do. You twist your neck a little to watch him as he sits up, rubbing your thighs together in anticipation. You can’t wait to feel his cock inside you again.

“Lift your leg for me, sweetheart,” he murmurs with a gentle pat to your top leg. You do so, shivering as he straddles your bottom one, gripping the one you just raised and hooking it over his hip. You have to twist your upper body a bit to watch him but other than that you’re comfortable. “You ready?”

“I’m _always_ ready for you, Kisame,” you purr with lidded bedroom eyes. Though you’re trying to act sultry it’s entirely true. He can knock on your door _any_ time and you will _gladly_ welcome him in.

He groans as he leans down for a kiss. You meet him eagerly for another taste of his minty salt-water flavor.

His cock slips inside you at the same time his tongue does. You gasp into his mouth, hips bucking against his thigh and making your clit brush deliciously against his skin. Okay, so _this_ position is quickly becoming one of your favorites. He moves slowly, gently working you open as his tongue laps and swirls around yours. When he finally settles to the hilt he pulls back and groans; face flushed that beautiful purple-red.

“You feel _amazing_ , sweetheart,” he huffs against your cheeks. “So soft and wet and tight around me.”

You moan as you buck against his thigh again, mind going hazy with need. “Please move, Kisame. I need to feel you fuck me.”

He groans as his hips twitch with barely held restraint. “I may get a little rough. Is that alright?”

You _whine_. “Pleeeease!”

Another rumbling groan is all the warning you get before he promptly starts to _rock your shit_ ; his thick, muscular arm wrapping tight around your thigh as he slams into you hard enough to make the sturdy solid wood bed rock. Luckily it’s not right up against the wall. You’re sure he would have knocked a hole in it if it was. All you can do is hang on for the ride; bottom hand reaching out to wrap around his bent knee as the other grips at the sheets next to it. 

After only a couple of minutes you’re coming again. The stretch and slick friction of his thick cock combined with the way your clit rubs roughly against his thigh with each heavy thrust is just too much. You cry out his name as you ride it out, head thrown back as you tense and shake and clench around him. He just grunts as he fucks you through it, face dark and feral as he takes in the slick flush of your skin and beautiful, open-mouth pleasure.

His pace remains steady and brutal as he fucks you through two more orgasms, hips smacking almost obscenely loud against your body as he grunts and growls and groans above you. His skin is flushed a dark purple-red as a thick sheen of sweat starts to form and glisten on it. It’s one of the hottest things you have ever seen in your _life_. A tiny part of you wishes you were a little more coherent to fully appreciate it. Instead you’re too busy gasping and shaking and hanging on for dear life.

His thrusts turn short and jerky as he finally reaches his own end; leaning over you as he groans loud and long and low. You feel him pulse against your walls before a thick, wet warmth paints your insides. There’s so much of it that it spills out over his cock and onto your thigh. God, it’s almost enough to make your poor, abused cunt come all over again.

“ _God_ , Kisame,” you pant as you glance down at the mess between your legs before looking up at his flushed face with hazy eyes. “I’m damn glad I’m on birth control because holy _fuck_. Not that I wouldn’t want your babies or anything! It’s just- you know what? I’m just going to shut up now.”

He just starts _laughing_ , wheezing so hard that his body jostles yours. You can’t help but laugh, too; relieved that he finds genuine, gentle amusement in your awkwardness.

“Ah, kitten, you’re too cute,” he teases as he wipes at his eyes. “I don’t know what we did to deserve you but I’m grateful for it.”

You flush so bad if you weren’t already sweaty you sure as hell would be _now_. “Well, I don’t know what I did to deserve such a nice, handsome man like you, Kisame. I really appreciate your patience and generosity with me.”

“It’s the least I can do, sweetheart,” he hums as he leans down for a gentle parting kiss.

You just hum back as you smile against his lips.


	4. Kisamehada/Reader (Canon)

“Wait, you can do _what_?!” you spit, mildly incredulous.

“Fuse with Samehada,” Kisame repeats casually, still polishing away. You’re both outside on the back porch again, enjoying the nice weather and talking while he works. As usual you couldn’t help but start asking more ninja-related questions. You’re just curiously nosy like that.

“But it’s a _sword_ ,” you say, turning your focus on the weapon itself rather than the beautiful hands working on it. You know that shinobi are capable of a _lot_ of incredible, reality-defying feats. Hell, you’ve seen some of them yourself. That still doesn’t make this particular revelation any easier to swallow. “It’s made of _metal_. How the hell do you fuse with metal?”

Kisame just shrugs as he recaps his polish and tucks it back into his pants pocket along with the cloth. “With seals and chakra, sweetheart. Just like everything else we do.”

“Show me.” You really don’t mean to sound so demanding but you just can’t help it. You have to see it to fully believe it. “Please.”

He visibly falters, eyes going wide as he turns them on you. “I…I don’t know about that, sweetheart. It’s…it makes me look…different.”

“Well, yeah, I’d imagine so,” you tease as you sidle a little closer to run a hand down the freshly polished Samehada. It’s always so pleasantly smooth and warm under your touch. “I still want to see. You can’t just tell me something like that and then _not_ show me, Kisa.”

He chuckles, scratching sheepishly at the back of his head. “Yeah, I guess not. Especially not with _you_. You really live up to your nickname; our own curious little kitten.”

You snort, eyes twinkling with mirth as you turn your attention back on him. “It’s not _my_ fault you guys are so damn interesting.”

“That’s a nice way of putting it, but sure. We’ll go with that,” he hums with a good natured grin as he stands up and tugs off his tank top. “Are you sure you really want to see it? Most people consider it a bit…frightening.”

You just roll your eyes as you wave at him to get on with it. “Yes, Kisa. I still want to see it. I promise you won’t scare me off.”

“I’ll hold you to it,” he teases as he grabs Samehada’s handle and takes several big steps back. You watch with widening eyes as both he and his massive sword start to glow with blue chakra, Samehada expanding as it grows row upon row of wicked-looking spikes. It starts to grow up Kisame’s arm, fusing and blending with his skin as it goes. Soon Kisame’s features start to change; large, shark-like fins growing out of his elbows as thick webbing forms between his fingers. He grows a tail, long and tapered at the end. His head changes last, hair disappearing as it’s replaced with another huge fin that stretches down his muscular back and his face smoothes into sharp, angular shapes. When he’s finished he looks even more shark-like than before; his mouth stretched into a wide, sharp grin. It’s…weirdly fucking hot.

“ _Oh…_ ” you breathe, moving to close the space between you as you instinctively reach out to touch his bare chest. His skin is slightly rough under your fingers, almost like sandpaper. He lets out a deep, pleased rumble as you slide them down to his stomach. The sound goes straight to your clit. “Can you have sex like this?” you ask before common decency can sink its claws back into you. What the fuck has living here done to you? Not that you’re really complaining.

His eyes go wide, blinking back at you in surprise. “I, uh, I can. I’m still…intact. More than intact, actually.”

“Good,” you say as you pull back and start to strip. It’s just Kisame and Itachi at the base today so the chances of you getting caught out here are next to nil. “Because I want you to fuck me like this.”

If his eyes get any wider you’re afraid they’ll pop out of his skull. “I’ve never… No one’s ever… I’m… I’ve got…”

Once you’re fully naked you go to tug at his clothes instead, horny brain making you impatient. “Well, there’s a first for everything, big guy,” you hum as you unbutton and unzip his pants. You yank them down his muscular thighs as soon as you’re done, exposing his prize to your hungry eyes. “ _Oh…_ ”

Obviously his appearance isn’t the only thing his transformation affected.

“I tried to warn you,” he teases as he watches you reach out and grab one in each hand. He hisses as you start to stroke them; already half-hard and twitching as you pump them to full-mast. “Sharks have two penises.”

“Apparently,” you breathe as you watch both beasts come to life in your hands. They’re both as big as his normal dick but now they’re slightly pointed at the ends; ridges down each giving them a wonderful texture you can’t _wait_ to feel inside you. “Not sure if I’ll be able to take them both at the same time. At least not at first. I’m sure as hell going to try, though.”

“We’ll do this however you want to, kitten,” he purrs as he watches you sink to your knees. “You just tell me what you want.”

“Right now I want to feel those ridges on my tongue, big guy,” you purr right back, looking up at him with lidded bedroom eyes. Apparently, this new form of his retains his ability to flush; blue-gray skin taking on that purple-red hue you adore. It’s so damn sexy.

You don’t say anything more, instead taking the head of his top cock into your mouth as you stroke a hand over the bottom one. You slide your other hand between your legs, fingers brushing against your already dampening pussy. Kisame sucks in a breath as you start to work, one huge, webbed hand moving to rest on your head to steady himself.

“You somehow manage to keep surprising me,” he groans as you sink down to take as much of him as you can into your hot little mouth. “I never would have expected you to react like this to this form. Not that I’m complaining.”

You pull off him with a slick ‘pop’ to answer, looking up at him through your lashes as your soft little hand continues to pump his other cock. “What can I say, handsome? You’re just so sexy in _both_ your forms.” You smirk when his flush deepens, not giving him a chance to answer as you switch to suck on his bottom cock instead, hand moving to run over the slick length of the other.

You continue until both your jaw and your pussy ache, sucking and swirling your tongue around one of his cocks as your hand pumps over the the other, your fingers working your clit. When you pull back to catch your breath and give your jaw a rest Kisame swoops in, scooping you up off the porch so fast you yelp. Instead of laying you on the picnic table like you expected, though, he continues to hold you by your thighs; your front pressed against his. You moan as the ridges of his bottom cock catch on your clit, legs instinctively wrapping around his waist as your arms latch onto his thick neck. 

“Always so slick for me,” he purrs as he grinds leisurely against you. “…But I think you could stand to be a bit slicker.”

And with that he begins to buck against you with abandon; hips thrusting up as he uses his arms to bounce you back down against each one. You gasp as you tighten your grip on him, just hanging on for the ride.

You’re so worked up it takes you almost no time to come, body locking up as it barrels through you. You muffle your cries in his thick skin, burying your face in his neck as you ride it out. He slows to a stop as you start to come back down, looking completely unruffled while you yourself are panting.

“You ready to take me, sweetheart?” he husks against the crown of your head.

“I’m _always_ ready to take you, Kisa,” you purr as you grind against him. He chuckles as he lifts you up a bit, the slightly pointed head of his bottom cock prodding against your sopping cunt a moment later. You both groan as he eases you down on it, slow and gentle.

“Hang on, kitten,” he rumbles as he lets you adjust a bit. “We’re about to give you a ride.”

You grin as you lean forward to settle in, tightening your grip around his neck in eager anticipation. “I’ll hold you too that, handsome.”

He growls, low and deep and sexy as all hell as he pulls back to get started.

And oh, does he give you a _ride_.

His earlier grinding pales in comparison to this; each thrust deep and fast and _savage_ as he pounds into you like the survival of your species depends on it. All you can do is hang on and wail, nails digging into his rough skin and he slams your hips down against each rough buck of his own. His ridges add a whole new layer to his already perfect cock, each one dragging deliciously against your g-spot as it stretches you out over and over and over again. As if that wasn’t enough, the ridges of the other catch on your swollen, aching clit, rubbing you in all the right ways. You’re coming again in no time at all, clenching down _hard_ around him as it quakes through you. He just snarls as he pounds you through it; thick, webbed fingers gripping your thighs so tight it’s sure to leave bruises.

“Kisameeeeee!” you wail when he doesn’t let up. His ridges against your oversensitive clit are quickly becoming too much. “Put both of them inside! _Please_!”

He actually slows down, then, pulling back a little to look down at you in wide-eyed surprise. “Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you, sweetheart.”

“I’m sure! Pleasepleaseplease!”

He groans as he stops completely, attention focused fully on you. “Do you want both in the front or one in each?”

You stare back at him with hazy eyes as you consider it, logical brain slowly coming back to you now that you have a chance to breath. Honestly, you’d love to have them both stuffed in your cunt but considering how full you felt with him and Deidara you wonder if you should hold off on that for a bit. Still, you don’t want to disappoint him after getting his hopes up so you’re willing to try it the other way for him. You’ve been curious to try it anyway. A voice deep in the back of your still-functioning rational brain is screaming at you to reconsider just what the hell you’re about to ask for but horny brain is still at the forefront and easily shuts it up. You’re sure Kisame will do an excellent job of easing you into it.

“One in each,” you answer after a moment. His eyes go so huge it’s almost comical.

“Are you positive? Don’t feel like you have to just to please me. I’m already super happy with this. In fact, why don’t we just - ”

You stop him the same way you did the first time, by reaching up to squish the sides of his face between your hands. You can feel the hardness of his extra teeth under your palms, the light sandpaper roughness of his skin under your fingertips.

“Kisame,” you start firmly to get his attention. He stops rambling as he stares down at you, face flushing. “I _want_ this. And I trust you to prepare me well for it.”

He stares at you for a moment longer before he slowly nods.

“…Alright,” he concedes quietly. “We can give it a shot. Just know that we can stop at any time, alright? And if I feel like it’s getting to be too much for you and you’re trying to push through it anyway I _will_ stop. No ‘ifs’, ‘ands’, or ‘buts’, you hear me?”

You grin at him, leaning in to give him a sweet peck on the jaw. “Then I leave myself in your _very_ capable hands, Kisa.” 

He just chuckles as he gently pulls out and sets you back down. You both grab your clothes before poking your heads inside, making sure Itachi is nowhere in sight before you scurry to your bedroom. You toss your clothes in a corner and grab your towel before eagerly climbing onto the bed, still horny and very much eager to restart the show. Kisame just chuckles again as he closes and locks the door before following your lead.

“I’m going to start with my fingers, alright?” he says as he grabs the lube out of your nightstand. “Slow and easy and work our way up.”

You just giggle as you smooth the towel down before settling back against your pillows and spreading your legs. “Sounds good to me, handsome.”

“I’m serious about stopping if you can’t take it,” he says firmly as he crawls on, the mattress dipping heavily under his weight. “Don’t try to act all tough about it. I can read your body, sweetheart. I’ll know if you’re bluffing.”

You soften despite yourself. Though his words could be mistaken for being condescending you know he’s just trying to keep you safe and comfortable. He really is a sweetheart. “I won’t, Kisame. And what about that jutsu Hidan used on my throat? Couldn’t that work here, too?”

He pauses to think about it. “…Yeah, that could work. I’m still going to prep you, though. The more the better.” He puts the bottle down to flash through the hand seals, pressing two of his fingers gently against your back door when he’s done. A tingling warmth spreads through you for a moment before disappearing, your muscles instantly relaxing. “How do you feel?”

“Good,” you answer as you wiggle down a little bit to better open yourself up for him. “I’m ready for you.”

“Alright,” he says with a gentle smile as he grabs the bottle and pours a generous amount onto his fingers. He puts the bottle off to the side before he shimmies down a bit to sprawl out on his stomach between your thighs. You feel the cool press of his slick finger against you a moment later, taking a deep breath as you make yourself relax. “Tell me if it gets uncomfortable.”

And with that he begins to slowly push inside.

It feels…strange. Not bad or anything, just not something you’re used to. The stretch is mild, not painful or even really uncomfortable. The webbing between his fingers keeps him from pushing it in as far as he’d like but it’s enough. You take another deep breath and sigh.

“You doing okay?” he asks, glancing up to check your face.

“I’m good,” you answer with a reassuring smile.

“Good. I’m going to use my tongue to help you relax while I add the others, alright?”

“Kisa, that is _more_ than alright,” you moan, cunt clenching at the thought. He just grins as he dips his head and gets to work.

He doesn’t really have lips in this form so he’s all tongue. It’s still warm and wet and ever so slightly rougher than usual as he presses it firmly against your sensitive clit, gently lapping at it as he eases another finger into your tight little ass. You suck in a breath as you instinctively reach out to press a hand against the spot where his head smoothes into his dorsal fin. You settle for grabbing onto the base of it in place of tangling your fingers in his hair.

Just like his first time he takes his time with you; gently lapping and swirling his tongue around your swollen clit while he eases his slick fingers into you one at a time. Soon enough he’s got all four in. You barely notice the stretch thanks to the jutsu and the wonderful things his mouth his doing to your cunt. You stare down at him with hazy eyes; chest rising and falling in a heavy pant as he works you towards another orgasm. He glances up to meet your eyes and gives you a sharp, predatory grin around his tongue; eyes dark and lidded and _hungry_.

You choke as your orgasm hits you full force, body clenching down hard around his fingers as you buck up into his face. A deep rumble vibrates from his chest as he throws his free arm over you to pin you down, keeping you firmly in place as you ride it out.

“Sharp teeth, remember?” he teases as he pulls back, slipping his fingers from your body as he goes. He reaches over to once again grab up the bottle of lube, spreading a generous amount onto his bottom cock before moving to settle between your spread thighs. It twitches against your ass, the cool press of it making you shiver. “You ready, sweetheart?”

“Fill me up, handsome,” you purr as you wrap your legs around his lower back. He chuckles as he reaches between you to line himself up, one cock against each hole. Once he’s in place he moves to rest his thumb against your clit, rubbing it gently as he eases himself inside.

You moan as both heads breach you, the stretch almost unbelievable. Even with all the prep you doubt you could have taken this without that jutsu. Kisame takes his time, staring into your flushed face to watch for any sighs of discomfort as he continues to rub at your clit.

“That’s it, sweetheart,” he rumbles lowly as you take a deep, shuddering breath. “Just keep breathing. Relax and focus on how good my thumb feels. You’re taking me so _well_ , kitten. You feel so good.”

You just focus on breathing as he keeps easing in, staring up through hazy eyes at his flushed face. His own eyes are lidded, wide mouth open in a slight pant as he stares back. Before you know it he’s buried to the hilt; cocks twitching inside you as his hips settle flush against your ass.

You gasp as he groans. You can feel his cocks rubbing together through the thin barrier between your walls; making you feel impossibly full. You’re glad you let him be the first one to do this. He’s the only one you know for sure would prep you this well, would focus so intently on your comfort and pleasure throughout.

“Please move, Kisame,” you gasp with a buck of your hips. “I want to feel you.”

He _moans_ as he hunches over you, one hand gripping your hip as he uses the other to hold himself up. You reach out to wrap your arms around his thick neck, hands gripping at his dorsal fin as you gear up for the ride.

He starts slow, thrusts short and easy as he gently fucks you open. Once he feels you fully relax around him he picks up the pace, thrusts longer and more moderate. You whine as you grind up against him, desperate for some contact against your needy clit. He chuckles as he drags your bottom half up to meet his, strong arm wrapping under your lower back to hold you in place as he continues to pound into you. The new angle makes his abdomen brush against your clit with each thrust, making you sigh and your eyelids flutter. He just feels so _good_.

He works you through one more orgasm before he finally picks up the pace, arm wrapping tightly around your back as he starts slamming into you hard enough to make the bed rock. All you can do is hold on, eyes rolling as he quite literally fucks you senseless. The stretch, the slick friction, the heavy pants and groans and the gorgeous, flushed and feral look on his face is just too much.

You manage to come once more right before he does; body locking up as you throw your head back and wail as it barrels through you. He snarls as his hips stutter, thrusts turning short and jerky as your walls tighten and spasm around him and push him over his own edge. He slams into you to the hilt and holds you there as he fills you up, the evidence of his pleasure spilling out over both of his cocks and staining the towel you thankfully had the foresight to put down. Once the storm passes you go limp under him, utterly exhausted.

“You still with me, sweetheart?” he pants as he eases out, lidded eyes staring hazily down at your face.

“Yeah,” is all you manage to get out. He chuckles as he gently sets you back down, sliding off the bed as he morphs back into his normal body. He rests Samehada against the wall before moving to dig out the wet wipes. He does his best to clean you up but the mess is a bit more than a few wet wipes can handle.

“Looks like a shower is in order,” he teases with a grin. You just groan and do your best to pout at him, clearly not ready to move. “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’ll carry you there and help you clean up.”

“You’re amazing,” you sigh with a soft smile. He just winks at you as he moves to put on his pants. Once he’s finished, he helps you sit up before dressing you in his tank top, just big enough on you to cover what it needs to without slipping off. Then he grabs your shower caddy from your closet and scoops you up, easily cradling you against his chest with one arm as he carries you out into the hall, heading towards the bathroom.

Unfortunately both fate and your timing is a bitch.

Itachi is just coming back from the bathroom himself, expression passive as ever. He glances at your form in Kisame’s arm, your face burning as you meet his dark eyes. There’s no way in hell that he doesn’t know what’s up. You just pray your naked ass isn’t visible from his angle. And that you’re not dripping or something equally gross and damning. God, you’re never going to be able to look him in the eyes again. Itachi’s lips twitch, but otherwise he doesn’t say anything as he nods at you both in silent greeting, Kisame grinning as he nods right back. Obviously he has no shame about any of this.

“Just drown me in the tub,” you groan once you’re in the bathroom. Kisame just laughs, loud and echoing in the tiled room.

“Oh, come on now, sweetheart!” Kisame teases with a bright grin and even brighter eyes. “Itachi knows what goes on behind your door. We’re both consenting adults. There’s nothing wrong or shameful in what we’re doing.”

“But it’s _Itachi_ ,” you whine as he gently sets you down at one of the wash stations and tugs off your shirt. “He’s just…it’s just… _different_ with him.” You honestly don’t know how else to explain it. Had it been literally anyone else you would have laughed it off but for some reason with him it just feels _wrong_. Like you’re offending him or lowering yourself in his eyes. You know you’re projecting but your brain just won’t stop.

“Itachi’s a quiet, private person but he’s not judgmental,” Kisame soothes as he tugs off his own pants and kicks them into a corner with his tank top. He drags over another stool and sits down on it before reaching over to grab the showerhead and turn it on; making sure the water is nice and warm before he starts to rinse you off. “Trust me when I say that is very, _very_ far from the worst thing he’s ever seen. In fact, I’d say he found it more funny than anything.”

You go quiet as you think about it. You don’t want to imagine the kinds of awful things ninja are forced to witness. If you were to have to choose between seeing consensual sex between adults and whatever horrors shinobi see on their missions you’d take the former every single time no contest. And Kisame is right. For all his quiet aloofness Itachi is far from judgmental. You’re just embarrassed and overthinking things.

Cleanup is quick and easy with Kisame’s help. He’s both gentle and thorough; murmuring quiet questions throughout to make sure you’re comfortable. Once you’re both clean he scoops you right back up, carrying you over to the bath for a nice, long soak together. You can’t help but doze a little as you lean back against his chest, the steady rise and fall of his breathing as soothing as the hot water. The nice, snuggly nap you take together after is equally soft and wonderful. Despite the wonderful aftercare, though, you still can’t help but wince a little whenever you sit down. You're not in any real pain but you _are_ a little sore. Kisame really did a number on you. Even so you’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.

Dinner is as usual. Since it’s just the three of you Itachi is more willing to talk. The conversations are easy and peppered with lip twitches and laughter; no residual awkwardness from the earlier incident to dampen it. You even play a few rounds of cards after. It’s perfect and you forget all about your Carry of Shame. The next morning, however…

There’s a throw pillow in your seat. Clearly Itachi noticed your slight wince last night. 

You flush as you ease down onto it and do your best to look nonchalant as you quietly thank him, unable to meet his eyes.

Itachi just smiles as he takes a sip of his tea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Itachi. The things this poor man puts up with. :P Alright, so this one is dedicated to Gwen/is probs Hidan and Miss Twila. Their monster fuckery was what helped get this particular ball rolling lol. They also made some gorgeous fanart that they gave me permission to share! 
> 
> Here's Gwen's/Hidan's: https://twitter.com/Sherlocktherav1/status/1309656795787468805?s=19
> 
> And here's Miss Twila's: https://twitter.com/Naughty_Vault/status/1309983152228663297
> 
> Hopefully this little tidbit helps tide you all over while I work on the next chapter of the main fic. Thanks for reading and stay safe out there, my lovelies! <3


	5. Daddy Kink Kakuzu Prompt (Non-Canon)

It starts off business as usual.

Kakuzu strolls in right before bedtime and you shut the door behind him; neither of you saying a thing. Instead of sitting in your chair, though, he stops and stares at the desk top. It’s currently littered with the spoils of your haul - plastic gachapon halves and various scraps of cloth sewn to look like little fruit-themed hats. You had been in the process of cleaning up when he knocked.

“What the hell are these?” he asks gruffly as he picks one of the strawberry ones up. He pinches it between his thumb and forefinger, holding it out away from him like it’s something disgusting or poisonous as he narrows his eyes at it. “What are you, five? Why the hell do you need so many doll hats?”

You immediately bristle, eyes narrowing right back. “They’re cat hats for Maneki and I bought them because I thought they were cute!” you snap, feeling the need to defend yourself to this judgmental asshole for whatever godforsaken reason. You know you _really_ shouldn’t care but he just rubs you all the wrong ways.

“Why do you have multiples of the same kind?” he huffs as he picks up another one that looks just like the first.

“I wanted the whole set!” you explain stiffly, crossing your arms. There were six in all; each one based on a different fruit. The pictures showing them off were so cute you couldn’t resist. The cats just looked so adorable in their little fruit hats. So what if you ended up with eleven of them? They can serve as backups! “You can’t exactly control which one comes out of the gachapon machine!”

“Why would you waste your hard-earned money on something so damn useless?” he asks, turning his eerie gaze on you. “What are you going to do when this job is over? You're going to be up shit creek because you blew all your pay on worthless crap.”

“Why the fuck do you care so much?!” you spit, giving him a look that would send Hidan or Deidara scrambling to apologize. Kakuzu just narrows his eyes at you, completely immune. “What the fuck are you trying to be?! My dad?!”

“Well obviously _someone_ needs to be,” he growls as he drops the little hats back on your desk and turns fully towards you; burly arms crossing over his chest as he mirrors your pose. “Clearly no one’s ever taught you basic self control.”

You snort and roll your eyes. “Oh, so I guess you’re going to offer yourself up, then? You gonna start policing my clothes next, _daddy_? Gonna tell me I can’t stay up past ten or eat too many sweets? Because if you are you can _get fucked_!”

He’s looming over you suddenly, so close you can practically feel the heat radiating off his body. You can’t help but swallow as you slowly look up to meet his eyes. Welp. Once again you have royally fucked up. You and your stupid mouth.

Instead of raw killing intent, however, you see dark, lidded eyes and a flush dusting his face. His breathing has kicked up, too. The only times you ever see him look like this are when you’re –

It hits you like a ton of bricks. Just completely blindsides you with the revelation.

“…Kakuzu, do you have a daddy kink?” You have to ask. You have to. You have to be sure.

Dead silence and the tightening of his arms across his chest is your only answer.

“Oh my god you _do_ ,” you breathe, giddiness rising at the thought. Now you finally have some ammo you can work with! Have something that you can use to get him back! It would only serve him right after he’s been such a huge, judgmental asshole to you.

“If you think that you can somehow use this to embarrass me you’re wrong,” he growls, low and gravelly. There’s a husky edge to it, though. An underlying lust that almost makes you shiver. “I’m too old to care about such nonsense.”

“Then why didn’t you mention it before now, _daddy?_ ” you coo, a malicious smirk tugging at your lips. “Clearly _something_ was holding you back. Were you afraid I’d tell the others?”

“The only two idiots who would be foolish enough to use it against me know better than to push it,” he rumbles. “I suggest you don’t, either.”

“And what are you gonna do if I don’t listen?” you purr, lids dropping into heavy bedroom eyes. You have ammo now and you are damn well going to use it. “You gonna punish me for being a bad girl, _daddy_? Gonna take away my toys and spank me ‘till I cry?”

Before you can blink his hand is around your wrist in an iron grip. You yelp as he uses it to drag you over to the chair, sitting on it before promptly dragging you over his lap. You can feel his cock through his pants, achingly hard and digging uncomfortably into the softness of your tummy. The hand not gripping your wrist immediately yanks off your shorts and underwear and tosses them aside, exposing your bare ass to his scrutiny.

“Seems I need to teach you some manners, girlie,” he husks as he rests his huge, warm hand against the center of it. You shiver, anticipation building between your legs and making you slick. His other hand leaves your wrist to tangle in your hair, tugging just hard enough to border on uncomfortable. “Remember that you asked for this when those tears start streaming down your face.”

You bite back another yelp as the first hit lands, sharp and stinging. It reverberates in the relative quiet of your room, a mocking reminder of just what you’ve gotten yourself into.

Of course your stupid mouth won’t let you off _that_ easy.

“You call that a slap?” you wheeze through the pain. “I’ve had worse hits from my arthritic grandmother!”

He _growls_ as he gives you another; this one harsh enough to make your whole body jolt on his lap. You can’t help but cry out, the sting almost too much.

“Seems your mouth needs something better to do than sass me,” he purrs with another bone-rattling slap. You groan and rub your thighs together, already getting desperate for some friction. “I want you to count each one I give you. Lose track and I’ll start all over again.”

“Kinky bastard, aren’t you?” you tease through watery eyes.

Another harsh spank; hard enough to make you squeal and squirm. “Wrong title, girlie.”

You just whine and go slack, knowing that you’re not going to get what you want if you don’t play along. “Sorry, daddy!”

“That’s better,” he purrs, cock twitching against your stomach. “Now start counting.”

He makes you count to ten; each slap as hard and sharp as the last. By the time you sputter out the last number your ass is well and truly aching, skin hot and stinging. There are tear tracks down your face, the water in your eyes having spilled over after the second counted hit. You groan and hang your head, the ache between your legs almost as bad as your backside. The sudden feeling of Kakuzu’s thick, calloused finger running up your slit makes you jolt. He chuckles; dark and self-satisfied.

“Seems I’m not the only kinky one,” he husks as he dips inside. You’re so slick it slips in easily; body making wet, lewd noises as he slowly starts to fuck you with it. You moan as you clench weakly around him. “You’re soaked, girlie. This was supposed to be punishment, you know. Yet here you are getting off on it…”

He slips another finger in and you _whine_ as you push back against him, desperate to be filled. Figures this would get you off. At this point you’d honestly be more surprised if it didn’t. “Please, daddy!”

“Please what?”

“Please fuck me! I need you!”

“And what makes you think I’m going to let you off that easy?” he teases as he slides his middle finger through your folds to rub against your swollen clit. You clench at the much-needed friction, moaning as you grind against him. God, it’s like all the pent-up frustration towards him has come out all at once. You’re so desperate for him it’s embarrassing. “You still need to learn some self control.”

Before you can say anything he’s pulling away, fingers leaving your cunt as the others untangle from your hair. You _almost_ whine in disappointment.

“Stand up,” he orders gruffly.

“And what if I like it on your lap?” you sass, some of your earlier bravado coming back to you. Why do _you_ have to be the one to give in? Why does _he_ get to boss you around? “I think I’ll just stay right he- ” you cut yourself off with a yelp as he gives your poor, abused ass another harsh spank, the sound ringing in your ears.

“If you want this to progress any further I suggest you do as I say,” he growls lowly in warning.

“Alright! Alright!” you gasp as you scramble off his lap. You rub at your butt as you stand in front of him, visibly pouting. You hate that this asshole still turns you on so much but you’re willing to swallow a little of your pride if it means he’ll finally help you get off.

“That was hardly a proper apology,” he rumbles with a sharp glare.

You just barely manage to rein in the heavy roll of your eyes. “Sorry, daddy.”

“That’s better,” he purrs as he settles back and spreads his legs. He pats his thigh in invitation. “Sit.”

Like a well-trained pet you obey; immediately moving to straddle his thick, heavily muscled thigh. When you go to grab at his shoulders for balance, however, your wrists are suddenly snatched up by thick black tendrils. You grunt as he uses them to wrestle your arms behind you, crossing them one on top of the other before looping around them tight enough to hold them in place.

“Just how many kinks are you going to subject me to tonight?!” you spit as you glare at him. Without your arms to help, your center of gravity forces you to remain completely upright least you lose your balance, making you bare almost all your weight on your cunt. Bastard.

He just smirks at you as he rests his hands on your hips, eyes dark and face almost unbearably smug. “As many as it takes to get you to behave, girlie. Now move.”

You roll your eyes as you start to grind, using your hips and thighs to get a good rhythm going. The weight of your body combined with the slightly rough fabric of his sleep pants creates the most delicious friction; clit catching with every little movement. His muscles occasionally tense and relax beneath you, adding to your pleasure. Soon enough you’re flushed and panting again; earlier transgressions all but forgotten as you get lost in a pleasant haze.

After a few minutes your breath hitches as you feel yourself start to peak, hips canting a bit faster against him. You stare at his face as you chase your high, your own flushed warm. His eyes are trained on the place there your body meets his, dark and lidded as they watch the show. As if feeling your gaze on him they snap back up to look at you. They darken even further when they see just how far gone you are. Your cunt clenches at the look, movements turning short and jerky as your body starts to tense in anticipation. Just a little more and-

His hands suddenly grip you near hard enough to bruise, stopping your movements completely.

“Daaaddyyy,” you whine as you twitch in his grasp. You were so _close_ , damn it!

“Did I say you could come?” he husks as he lifts you up and sets you to stand on shaky legs. He stands up right after, making quick work of removing his pants and underwear before sitting again. His cock is flushed and achingly hard, twitching against his abdomen as he once again settles back in your chair. “You’ll come on my cock. And even then only when I tell you to.”

You puff up at him, bristling like Maneki does whenever you need to give her a bath. Before you can open your mouth to snark at him, however, he’s grabbing you by the elbow and flipping you around. He snatches the cord around your bound arms and drags you over to straddle his lap, your back to his front as the tip of his cock nudges at your dripping cunt. The insult you were about to throw hitches in your chest, giddy anticipation quickly taking its place.

“The better you are for me the sooner I’ll let you get off,” he purrs as his other hand re-takes its place in your hair. “Keep acting like a brat, though, and I may not let you come at all.”

“ _May_ not?” you tease with a cheeky smirk over your shoulder. “How much leeway does that give me? And wouldn’t a good daddy _want_ to take care of his girl? Seems like you - ”

You choke as he promptly slams you down on his cock, clearly tired of your lip. He doesn’t give you a chance to regain your bearings before he’s bouncing you up and down, using his grip in your hair and on your bonds for leverage. God, he’s _thick_. He feels so good, stretches you out so well, rubs up against everything just right. If you didn’t have so much experience already with Kisame you’re sure this would have turned out very differently.

“Not so talkative now are ya, girlie?” he growls as he starts thrusting up to meet every hard downward pull. All you can do is whine and tilt your head back to ease some of the tension on your scalp, body jolting on his lap. He’s being so rough with you the smack of your bodies echoes almost as loud as your earlier spanking did. “Kinda hard to when you’re being fucked stupid. Though if you ask me nicely I may play with that pretty clit of yours. I know you’re aching for it.”

You moan at his words, cunt clenching. God, you want nothing more right now. “Please, daddy!”

“Please what?”

“Please play with my clit! I ache so badly!”

He groans as he gives you what you want; a single black tendril snaking out of his wrist near your waist and sliding down and around to your front to press right up against where you need it most. You mewl at the feeling, hips bucking of their own accord as you clench down on him. God, it’s almost too much. The thick stretch of him, the wet friction against your walls, the roughness of his cord against your aching clit, his strong fingers tugging at your hair. If you’d known he’d be _this_ good you would have taunted him into fucking you much sooner.

In no time at all you’re close to peaking again, cunt fluttering around him as your body starts to lock up and your hips start to jerk. God, it’s going to be a good one. Just a little more and –

He pulls his tendril away before you can topple over that blissful edge, pulling you off his cock at the same time and leaving you achingly empty and clenching around nothing. You actually sob, hips twitching as your pleasure ebbs. 

“Remember what I said about only coming when I say so?” he huffs against your ear, breath scalding and tone taunting.

“Kakuzuuuuu,” you whine, writhing against his iron hold. He’s going to drive you insane if he keeps denying you like this. A sharp, whip-crack hit from one of his tendrils against your ass cheek makes you jolt and yelp.

“Wrong title.”

“ _Goddamn it_ – please keep fucking me, daddy! I want to come on your cock!”

“And what makes you think you deserve it?”

“THE FACT THAT I’VE PUT UP WITH YOUR BULLSHIT THIS LONG, ASSHOLE!”

Obviously that’s not what he wants to hear because all your outburst earns you is another crack across your ass. You just barely rein in another sob, blinking rapidly against the frustrated tears dampening your lashes and threatening to spill over. God, this man drives you absolutely crazy in every way possible.

“That was rude, girlie,” he growls with a hard tug of your hair. “Apologize.”

“Sorry, daddy!”

“That’s better,” he purrs. He lifts you up again, settling you so that the tip of his slick cock teases at your sopping entrance. You moan and cant your hips at the feeling, desperately trying to coax him back inside. “Now, I’ll ask you again. What makes you think you deserve it?”

“I promise I’ll be good!” you beg, canting your hips again. He drops you just enough to let his head pop in before quickly yanking you off him again, teasing at what you could have and making you whine. “I’ll be a good girl, daddy! I promise I will! Just please, please, _please_ let me come!”

“I’ll hold you to it.”

And that’s all the warning you get before he slams you back down on his cock.

He’s just as ruthless as before, bouncing you on him so hard and sharp it’s all you can focus on. He meets every downward trip with an upward thrust of his hips, making his cock catch _just right_ on your g-spot. When his cord snakes back around to play with your clit you finally get what you wanted.

You come with a loud, choking sob; vision going white behind your tightly closed eyes as your body tenses and shakes. He just keeps fucking you through it; doesn’t even slow down. He forces you through two more in quick succession before he finally comes himself, slamming you down on his lap and holding you there as he twitches inside you before filling you up with a long, drawn-out groan. You’re too far gone to fully appreciate it; flushed and panting and damp with a light sheen of sweat.

“What do you say, girlie?” he asks after a moment to get his own breath back.

“Thank you, daddy,” you slur.

He chuckles as he finally lets go of your hair, the tendrils around your arms unwinding and sliding back into his body. “Good girl.”

Your legs are shaky when you go to stand, muscles still a bit tense and achy. You stumble a bit as you try to make your way over to the nightstand, arms shooting out to steady yourself –

-Only to be steadied by a strong hand on your shoulder instead. 

“Finally going soft for me, Kakuzu?” you tease as he gently directs you towards the bed.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” he says gruffly. “I just didn’t want you to fall back on me.”

“Didn’t seem that way to me a minute ago,” you hum as you climb on. You are very much ready to crawl under the covers and go to sleep, wet spot be damned. You’ll just wash your sheets tomorrow.

“You promised me you were going to stop being a brat,” he growls as he digs out the wet wipes. He hands one to you before pulling one out for himself. “Yet here you are still sassing me.”

You can’t help but laugh as you clean up. “That was said in the heat of the moment. I’d argue it can’t be used against me.”

“Well then I guess I’ll just have to keep coming back until the lesson sinks in, girlie,” he says with a smirk as he pulls on his pants.

“Is that supposed to be a threat?” you tease as you settle in. “Because if it is it’s a shitty one.”

“It’s a promise,” he says as he opens the door. “Don’t forget to set your alarm. I don’t want to have to wait on breakfast.” And with that he’s gone, closing your door softly behind him.

You roll your eyes as you do just that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all my Discord buddies who helped me bounce ideas around for this one! Gwen and Twila, I'm pretty sure I managed to fit in everything lol. 
> 
> Stay strong, my gremlins!


	6. Violent Kisame Prompt (Non-Canon/AU)

It’s a cloudless, early July day when Mama Reality decides to give you another well-meaning backhand.

You trudge out of the base behind Kisame and Itachi, dressed in your most comfortable shorts and tank top against the oppressive heat. The Land of Fire really lives up to its name in summer. More than anything, though, you wish it weren’t so damn _humid._ At least then your sweat would actually evaporate and alleviate some of your discomfort. You still don’t fully understand how the guys can stand to be dressed in long-sleeve black cloaks in this bullshit; chakra control or no. Even with the shade the trees provide the air feels almost stiflingly heavy in your lungs.

“You gonna be okay there, sweetheart?” Kisame snickers when your nose immediately scrunches in displeasure at the weather.

“Ugh, yeah,” you start as you turn your back so that Kisame can tie your blindfold. “So long as you’re okay with doing a load of laundry after this. I’m sorry but I’m probably going to sweat all over you.”

“So nothing new, then,” he teases as he slips a finger under it to make sure it’s not too tight. You flush as you turn back around and reach out to grab onto his broad shoulders. Great. As if your face wasn’t already hot enough.

“Kisaaaa,” you whine in his ear as he hitches you up his back. “Not in front of Itachiiii.” Kisame just laughs.

“I assure you that's far from the worst thing he’s ever said in my presence,” Itachi pipes up as they take to the trees. Your flush deepens. Damn ninja and their superhuman hearing.

“Still, that doesn’t mean you should have to put up with our bull,” you point out as you rest your chin on Kisame’s shoulder, your arms hanging down in front of his chest. You know Itachi's been subjected to far worse from witnessing your interactions with Hidan but that doesn’t make this any less awkward. You hate feeling like you’re making him uncomfortable. “Especially since you’re usually too polite to point out things that make you uncomfortable.”

“I promise that there are many things far less preferable to listen to than your harmless flirting,” Itachi shoots back smoothly from a little ways behind you. “Please don’t feel the need to censor yourself on my behalf.”

“See, kitten?” Kisame says with a gentle squeeze to your thighs. “We’ve got the great Itachi Uchiha’s blessing!” You snort, lips twitching up into a crooked little grin.

“Well then so long as you don’t turn into another Hidan I suppose a little of it is fine,” you joke back as you settle in for the ride. The breeze their speed creates is nice. Hopefully it’ll be enough to stave off the majority of the sweat. You’d hate to walk into the grocery store looking all damp and gross.

Kisame laughs again, his back and shoulders shaking under you. “Surely you know I have a little more class than that by now!”

“I don’t know, big guy. You can be pretty shameless sometimes.”

“What can I say? You’re extra cute when you’re flustered.”

The banter continues for a bit before transitioning into more general conversation. You ask about what summers were like in their old villages and they regale you with a few stories. Naturally, the Land of Water doesn’t get nearly as hot as Fire does; the breeze from the nearby ocean enough to stave off the majority of the heat. Konoha summers are the same as the rest of Fire’s; hot and humid and beautifully green. You quietly hope you get to see both someday.

When you’re only a few minutes away from town Kisame casually reveals that there’s a lake near the hideout. Apparently he likes to swim there whenever the heat gets to be a bit much. Naturally, you jump on another chance to get out of the base.

“Oh man, I haven’t gotten a chance to go for a proper swim in _ages_ ,” you sigh wistfully. A dip in a nice, cool lake sounds like heaven right now. Your clothes are already starting to stick to you in the places where your body is pressed against his. “Would you mind some company the next time you go?”

“Not if that company is you, sweetheart,” Kisame teases with another gentle squeeze to your thighs. “We can even walk there if you want! Its close enough that -”

He stops talking suddenly, body going rigid under your touch. You frown.

“Kisa?” you start. “What’s -”

You cut yourself off with a startled yelp as he suddenly jerks to the left; grip tightening on you as something whistles through the air you just occupied. Whatever it was makes impact with the tree to your right; sharp little ‘shtickshstickshstick’s ringing in your ears as they imbed themselves in the wood.

“How many?!” Kisame snarls as he dodges another round. Your body instinctively stiffens, muscles going bow-string tense as you cling to him like your life depends on it.

“Twelve in all,” Itachi calls back from your immediate right. “I’ll hold them off. Get her out of here.”

“Hang on, ________,” Kisame warns. “I’m going to need my hands for a moment.”

You don’t have to be told twice. You hunker down as your grip turns achingly tight; heart pounding deafeningly loud in your ears as adrenaline courses through your veins. You feel his hands leave your thighs, no doubt to flash through some hand seals. A moment later you hear several loud ‘poofs’, smoke filling your nostrils from whatever jutsu he just used. His hands are immediately back on you, body lurching as he drops to the ground and takes off at a dead sprint.

The muggy air whips at your skin and whistles in your ears as he runs; the muscles in his back tense enough to shatter. Neither of you breathes a word. You just focus on not falling off as he focuses on finding a place to hide you.

After what feels like an eternity but was most likely only a couple of minutes he stops, dropping down into a crouch to help you slide off his back. You just keep clinging to him, arms and legs trembling. It honestly feels like your muscles have locked up.

“I know you’re scared, sweetheart, but I need you to let go of me,” he says, low but firm. “I can’t help either of you like this.”

“Sorry,” you whisper as you force your fingers to let go of the death grip they have on his cloak. You slide off his back to stand on shaky legs, waiting for his next direction. He grabs your shoulder and guides you over to something.

“Duck your head,” he says as he gently pushes you down to rest on your hands and knees. You instinctively crawl forward; the rough scratch of tree bark scraping lightly at your arms and legs as he guides you into a tree hollow under some thick roots. “Keep your blindfold on and don’t come out until Itachi or I tell you to.”

You just hunker down as you hear another ‘poof,’ no doubt from him retrieving Samehada from its storage scroll.

And with that he’s gone.

The forest is eerily quiet. No birds chirp, no animals scurry, no leaves rustle in the non-existent breeze. All you have to fill the void is your pounding heart and shaky breathes. You do your best to remain calm; breathing deep as you strain your ears for any sign of Itachi or Kisame’s return. As the quiet seconds stretch on onto quiet minutes you start to wonder.

Why on earth were you attacked? You know shinobi fight each other but you all were just minding your own business; heading towards town on a supply run. Nothing about what you were doing should have drawn negative attention so why-

The sharp crack of a tree branch makes your breath catch, air hitching in your lungs as every hair on your body stands on end.

“Hold on,” a voice you don’t recognize says. From the pitch and timbre it sounds like a man. “I feel an undeveloped chakra presence here.”

The light thump of feet hitting the ground reaches your ears as they jump down from the trees; two pairs from the sound of it. You hunker down further, pressing back against your hiding spot as deep as you can go. You hear the soft pad of feet on green grass as they look around. You go dead quiet, not even daring to breathe.

“Come out quietly and we promise no harm will come to you,” another voice says; a woman. “We can tell you’re a civilian.”

Nope. No way in hell you’re going to believe that. These loons attacked _you_. You’ll be damned if you listen to them.

The padding grows closer, the rustling of grass just outside your hiding place, then-

“Here she is,” the man calls to his partner. The next thing you know there’s a hand around your bicep, grip tight as he uses it to drag you out. You yelp as you desperately try to tug free, fear spiking like wildfire in your chest.

“Calm down,” he says lowly as he catches the wrist of your other arm. “We’re not going to hurt you.”

“Why on earth would they have a civilian with them?” the woman asks from somewhere to your left. “They can’t have been carrying her around as a potential hostage in case of attack. Otherwise they wouldn’t have taken the pains to hide her.”

“Don’t know,” the man replies as he struggles with you. “She has to be a hostage of some kind, though. Why else would she be with them?”

Wait, is that why they attacked you? They thought Itachi and Kisame were holding you hostage? You suppose from an outsider’s perspective it would look a little strange for two shinobi to be running around with some random civilian woman on their backs.

“Is that why you attacked us?” you gasp as you stop struggling. “I promise I’m not a hostage! I work for them willingly.”

Dead silence.

“You work for them _willingly_ …” the man repeats lowly, grip tightening hard enough to make you wince.

“And what is it you do for them, exactly?” the woman asks, tone icy sharp.

“I’m the maid!” you sputter out, fear spiking all over again. This isn’t the reaction you were expecting _at all_. “I cook and clean and run errands! They pay me and everything!”

More silence. Then-

“Well, _this_ certainly changes things,” the woman says darkly. “An unguarded inside look into their group. T&I would have a field day with her.”

“The information we could get out of her would certainly be invaluable to the Village,” the man hums thoughtfully. “After we get what we need we could sell it off to the other Villages. I’m sure they’re dying to get their hands on something more tangible.”

“Then it’s settled,” the woman says definitively. “We’ll take her back with us.”

Dread settles like an icy weight in your gut, cold and heavy. You don’t know what T&I is but you’re sure it’s nothing pleasant. Whatever they’re planning on doing with you you’re sure you won’t like it one bit.

“No!” you shout as you start to thrash against your captor’s hold. “ _No!_ ”

“Stop it,” the man hisses as he wrestles you to the ground. You put all your strength into fighting back, pushing and pulling and kicking against him in equal measure in a desperate bid for freedom. “You’re only making this harder on yourself.”

You lunge forward and sink your teeth into the closest thing to your mouth. He yelps and pulls back, stars bursting behind your eyelids as the sharp sting of a backhand blooms across your cheek a moment later, knocking your blindfold askew.

“You really have a way with the ladies, Hikaru,” the woman teases as your vision both brightens and starts to swim. “I’m having a hard time seeing why you have such trouble getting a date.”

“Shut it, Ayano,” the man spits as he twists you around and shoves your face into the dirt. You turn it to the side so you don’t suffocate, vision clearing enough to get a good look at them.

They’re wearing masks, smooth and mostly white with slit-thin eye holes. The only distinguishing marks are the thick red swirls across the bottom of the woman’s and the blue ‘tusks’ painted on the man’s. Their foreheads are adorned with four wavy lines; the same ones that are carved into Kisame’s headband.

You’re jolted back to the present by a sharp tug in both of your shoulders. The man pulls your arms behind your back, tying your wrists together with a short, rough length of rope. You screech.

“Be quiet!” he barks with another hard smack to the back of your head.

“Just use that blindfold to gag her,” the woman replies casually, propping a hand on her hip as she watches. “It’ll be much easier.”

You screech again as you feel him yank it off your head, desperately hoping you’re loud enough to get Kisame’s or Itachi’s attention. You’re abruptly cut off when he shoves it into your mouth, fabric rough and drying against your tongue as he ties it in place with another piece of rope around your head. He rolls you over onto your back when he’s finished, the hard press of his knee sinking into your thighs and the harsh bite of rope digging into your skin as he quickly ties your legs together at the ankles.

“Well, since I took care of that I think it’s only fair that you get to be the first one to carry he-”

The man suddenly jumps up and whirls around, kunai drawn. Apparently his reaction time isn’t quite fast enough because a heartbeat later he’s literally _cut in half_ ; the edge of an all-too familiar sword tearing through him at the waist like he’s no thicker than tissue paper. The slick crunch of muscle and bone reaches your ears as blood splatters across your face and shoulders, wet and sickly warm. His top half falls to one side while the bottom topples to the other; entrails spilling out to glisten in the grass like worms on a sidewalk after rain. Kisame stands where the man once did with a terrifyingly _feral_ look on his face; eyes wide and wild, nostrils flared, and sharp teeth bared in a snarl of pure rage. His eyes widen further when they catch sight of your own, something like fear flashing across them before you shut yours and turn away, shuddering violently as you fight down the sudden intense urge to puke. With the gag in your mouth you could drown on it.

The woman shouts something you don’t catch, the ring of metal on metal piercing the air as she no doubt tries to fight back. The loud hiss of a water jutsu, more ringing, then –

Another slick crunch. A long, wet gurgling noise.

Silence.

A moment later you feel a gentle tug at your gag. You instinctively flinch.

“Easy, sweetheart,” Kisame soothes. “It’s just me.”

As soon as he cuts the rope and pulls the cloth from your mouth your stomach revolts. Kisame quickly rolls you over onto your side as you puke up everything in a few loud, aching heaves, the acid burn of bile stinging in your throat and sharp on your tongue. As soon as your gagging gives way to ragged breathing he cuts off the rest of your binds. You scramble to your knees as soon as you’re free, hands slipping in blood and vomit as your body goes into fight or flight mode. You head straight towards the nearest hiding place, shoving yourself back into the tree hollow as panicked-animal brain takes over.

“Sweetheart?”

His voice sounds so small and afraid that it would break your heart if you were in your right mind. His worried face comes into view a moment later, body blocking out a majority of the light as he crouches down to look at you. Though he no longer looks a hairsbreadth away from razing everything in his path he’s still covered in the remnants of his rampage; blood splattered across his face and soaking into his cloak and hair. You flinch back on instinct, curling into yourself as tight as you can.

A distant shout reaches you both, the clashing of shuriken and roar of a massive fire jutsu. Kisame glances away from you to look towards the source of the fighting, torn. It sounds like it’s coming this way. He wants to move you but it’s obvious Itachi needs his help. As skilled as his partner is the numbers are far from their favor. And it’s clear you’re not in the right mind to be touched right now. He’s not sure his heart could handle that rejection after the look you gave him earlier; your eyes wide and panicked and _scared._ In that moment you didn’t see your ‘handsome’ or your ‘big guy.’

You saw the monster everyone else calls him.

Another shout, closer this time.

“Stay here,” he orders lowly as he stands to his feet. He’ll help Itachi take care of the rest of them; hopefully before the fighting can reach a place to be a danger to you.

And then he’s gone again.

You’re not sure how long you stay in that hollow; curled up and shaking like you can’t get warm despite the stifling heat. The sounds of fighting pick up and ebb away, roll in before dragging back like waves on a sandy shore. You just stay huddled in your hiding space, afraid of what you might see should you come out.

Finally, just as your heartbeat starts to come back down, things go quiet.

A tense, silent minute, then –

The soft thump of someone jumping down from the trees. Then another. You tense, heartbeat spiking again.

A shadow darkens the entrance of your hiding space.

And then Kisame is once again crouched in front of you, somehow looking as small as you’ve ever seen him despite taking up the entirety of your vision.

“I’m sorry.”

It sounds as small as the rest of him; quiet. Afraid. Combined with the stress chemicals still pumping through your body it almost makes you laugh.

What does _he_ have to be scared of? You just watched him tear through a grown man like it was nothing; shred another shinobi in half like it was no more difficult than ripping a page out of a book. Yet here he is cowering like a chastised dog at your feet. Why the hell would he be afraid of _you_?

…But the way he’s looking at you tugs at the softness of your heart despite it all. He just looks so _lost_ ; like a man slowly drowning at sea desperately trying to get a passing ship’s attention. Like you’re the only one that can save him.

Suddenly you don’t see a shinobi anymore. You don’t see a man capable of killing you as easily as breathing. Don’t see a man capable of rampages comparable to Mother Nature’s own raw fury.

You just see Kisame. A man you know in your bones would never hurt you. A man you’ve grown deeply attached to. A man who’s hurting just as much as you are.

Your body moves before your brain can fully process it; shifts forward to crawl slowly on your hands and knees towards him. His breath hitches as he watches you, swallowing thickly. Once you’re a hairsbreadth from him you sit up on your knees, eyes level with his collarbone.

And then you reach out and hug him.

He stiffens briefly as your arms wrap around his neck, shudders as you bury your face against it. He reaches back as you start to cry; silent, wracking sobs vibrating against his chest and tears warm on his skin. He murmurs quiet apologies in your ear as he holds you (“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t mean for you to see that. I would never hurt you. _Never_ ”), rocks you back and forth as you shatter against him.

He holds you until your sobbing stops; until your eyes are dry and your breathing comes easy. When you pull back he seems almost reluctant to let you go. 

“I’m ready to go home, please,” you whisper as you rub at your eyes, voice still thick and raw in your throat. You don’t care how childish it sounds. All you want right now is to go somewhere you feel safe. Kisame’s breath hitches again.

“‘Home’ as in back to base or ‘home’ as in back to town?” he asks quietly.

“Back to base.”

“…Yeah. Yeah, okay.”

The trip back is silent. You noticed that when you fully crawled out to put your blindfold back on the bodies were gone; nothing but a bit of charred grass where they’d once been. Itachi must have taken care of them while you were crying all over Kisame. Though what you witnessed will forever be engraved in your memory you’re still grateful for that small mercy. You chose to go back with Kisame and though he didn’t comment on it you could tell he was quietly relieved.

The next couple of days pass in a strange quiet. You don’t feel much like talking and neither of the guys feel inclined to make you. Kisame especially keeps his distance; only coming out around during meal times and talking only when spoken to. He watches you out of the corner of his eye, quietly waiting and obviously not wanting to push. The rest of your group is still out of the compound; a fact you’re grateful for. You’re not in the mood or mindset to deal with any of them right now.

You’re not stupid. You’re not ignorant. You _know_ that shinobi kill each other. That’s just what the military does. You know that Samehada isn’t just for looks or bragging rights, either. No one would carry a sword like that outside of intent to use it. You just never thought you’d ever have to see any of it firsthand.

You also know that Kisame did what he did to protect you. It was clear that whatever those masked shinobi were planning on dragging you off for would be far from pleasant. Their quick shift from ‘we won’t hurt you’ to manhandling and smacking you around proved as much. Part of you knows that a good bit of his rage was on your behalf, was sparked from a fear for your safety. As fucked up as it is to think about the thought is still strangely comforting in a way.

You head out back on the third day, desperate for some fresh air and sunshine despite the heat. Maybe you’ll finally be able to clear the last of this fog from your head.

Kisame’s on the porch, polishing Samehada.

He freezes when you step out, eyes going wide as you close the door. He stands.

“I – I’ll head back inside, if you want,” he stutters. “I can always do this later.”

You give him a soft smile. “It’s alright. I don’t mind your company.”

“Are you sure? You really don’t have to -”

“Kisame I want you to stay.”

“…Alright.”

He sits back down almost awkwardly, avoiding your eyes as he once again goes back to polishing his sword. You just sit in the closest available chair, settling in as you crack open your book and pretend to read. Things go quiet as you both dance around the elephant on the porch, the gentle rustling of leaves and chirping of birds the only sounds between you.

When it becomes clear that he’s waiting for you to make the first move you finally speak up.

“…Can I touch your sword?”

His head whips around to look at you so fast you’re surprised he doesn’t get whiplash; his eyes so wide it’s almost comical. Your lips twitch up into a small, amused smile.

“I don’t, you don’t, are you really –“

You cut him off by standing up and walking over, words dying on his tongue as you slowly reach out to press a gentle hand against Samehada like you always do. He swallows around a thick lump in his throat, watching with wide eyes as you slowly trail it up to rest against his, soft and warm as you cup it over his own. It’s the first time you’ve touched him since you all got back.

“I know that you were protecting me,” you murmur quietly, staring at your hands rather than his face. “And that you would never hurt me. I… I’m sorry if I made you feel that way.”

“You have nothing to apologize for, sweetheart,” he murmurs as he brings his other hand up to rest on top of yours, warm and strong. “You should have never had to see what you did. I… I should have controlled myself better. I just… when I heard you screaming something in me snapped. All I could focus on was destroying whoever it was that dared to hurt you.” His hand tightens over yours, like he’s suddenly afraid you’ll slip away and he’ll lose you forever. “I’m sorry you had to see that side of me.”

You hum, eyes softening as you finally look up at his face. He’s not looking at you, either; gaze cast down towards your hands like yours was moments ago.

“…It was scary, I’ll admit,” you start quietly. “…But it’s only one part of you. The others I’ve seen aren’t anything like that. You’ve been nothing but good to me, Kisame. Nothing but soft and sweet and kind. You haven’t given me any reasons to believe that those parts of you are gone.”

He looks up at you, then; breath hitching and eyes wide.

“I’d never hurt you,” he says lowly, softly. “I’d rather die.”

Your own breath hitches; tears stinging at your eyes. The look on his face is so serious, so intense that you know he 100% means it. He’d really rather suffer the pain himself than put you through it. God, what did you do to deserve such a promise?

“I know,” you say, voice small and tight. You rub away the tears in your eyes with your free hand, not knowing what else to say.

After another quiet minute he lets you go. You immediately miss his warmth. Miss _him_.

“…When you’re finished polishing Samehada would you like to come back to my room?”

His hand pauses again, eyebrows raising a little as he looks back at you.

…Then he smirks, eyes softening as he reaches into his pants pocket for his storage scroll.

“I’d say Samehada can wait.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I went ahead and decided to keep this non-canon purely because it would interfere with things that happen in later chapters. What happened here would bring up a lot of questions that Reader would want answered and exploring all that would go far beyond a simple one-shot. However, this is something that definitely *could* have happened in the main story. Think of it as a sort of AU. 
> 
> As always, a big shoutout to my wonderful betas ToMakeMeTame and SaltySeaFarms! I couldn't do this without you guys. 
> 
> Thanks for reading, babes. Stay safe out there. <3


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